Matthew’s Restart Plan

My last post was two years ago (almost exactly). I’ve written a few draft posts in the intervening time, but haven’t completed any of them or felt comfortable what I ended up writing. So let’s ignore the time gap and jump back into things!

Now that the COVID-19 pandemic is seemingly “over-ish”, you’re probably seeing a bunch of ‘restart plans’ out there as I have seen. They outline how we’ll all work together to get back to ‘normal’ or try to figure out how to do the things that we haven’t been able to do for the past two years.

In the early days of 2020, I was excited to finally start doing things again, especially after an excruciatingly painful previous year. My health was beginning to bounce back with my new treatments, my then-boyfriend was finally coming back for a month to visit and talk about plans for the future, I was moving back in with some of my family, and a few other positive things.

I was also looking forward to reconnecting with people that I hadn’t been able to keep in touch with while dealing with all of my physical, mental, and spiritual health problems. So you can imagine my disappointment, discouragement, and outright dismay after thing after thing started to go wrong after that.

Anyway, flash forward to now!

Since that time, I feel like I’ve been putting pretty much everything on hold; More than ever before, actually. To some degree that was required, as we all had to do our part in the pandemic response. But also, in my situation, things weren’t so great for the past two years… and I was essentially in survival mode.

It’s time to move beyond that! I’ve put in a lot of work to deal with my anxiety, depression, OCD, ADD, OMG, CPTSD, CFS, and other (seemingly unending) ongoing problems.

I don’t know why exactly, but I’ve been having this sense of– I don’t know exactly what word to use… renewal! A sense of renewal has been in the air, and I’ve been itching to act on it. Which brings me to one of the specifics of my “restart” plan!

What I mean by my “restart plan” should be fairly obvious by now, but I’d like to clarify it here as I’m using this post as a way to straighten out my thoughts and as one of the ways to document the journey for myself/others. Basically, I’m restarting my life after years of being sick (with my Crohn’s and related) and feeling disconnected from everything and everyone. I’m tired of watching things happen around me as I try to cope and survive instead of engaging and being involved. Having things happen with me or because of me, and not for the usual ‘health-related’ reasons.

So to that end, I’ve decided that my first step should be to transform my habitat to start transforming the way I live day-to-day! And I’ve decided to employ the KonMari Method of tidying to teach myself a completely new way to approach how I think about my things and my living space.

Through the process I’m hoping to reevaluate my life and figure out what priorities I truly would like to honour as I move forward. I’d also like to learn more about my past through the things I have decided to hold onto, then let go of those things with a grateful and kind mindset to make way for the present and the future.

This is the beginning of a new chapter. And I’m ALL IN.

A new week!

So last week went fairly well. Especially goal-wise! Huzzah and Wooton!!

And now for my report card on how I did this past week. I’ll try to not be too hard on myself (after all, these are goals to push myself forward), but still make an honest assessment.

Last week’s ‘getting back on track’ goals.

1. No technology after 10:00 pm – B-

I did not too bad… at first. On the weekend I slid a little bit, but that was partially due to not feeling great and having a hard time sleeping. But I feel great with how I did and especially with the results of cutting back on night-time technology use. I found that it really helped me get ready for bed way earlier than I usually do.

2. Walk the dogs daily – A+

The muppies were so excited about getting daily walks again! Well, more like beyond excited. Especially once they figured out that there was a pattern developing. They wouldn’t have let me forget about this goal even if I wanted to. I really enjoyed the time outside in the dark night. Even if it was -30° C for a couple of days.

3. Keep a positive attitude – A+

I excelled at this one, as expected! 😛 Now I’m using it to artificially inflate my overall score for this week, thus making me feel better about my goal-setting and achieving powers.

Overall score: A

Yay for new goals!

1. No technology after 10:00 pm

I’m gonna stick this one in here again and probably keep it around until it becomes more of a habit.

2. Work on plans for the fall

I had intended to use February as a planning month to figure out what I will be doing after Paddlefest and my summer trip. I have made almost no progress on doing this, and so with the last week of February upon me (eek!), I decided to make this one of my goals.

3. Finish editing and release podcast

I started editing The Cowmoonity Fancast on Saturday, but I didn’t get to finish it over the weekend for various reasons. It needs to be done this week for sure, so to the list it is added!

4. Eat more often

I have been having tummy problems the past few days. Recently when that happens, I’m finding myself eating very little. This isn’t good, especially for my energy levels. But when I am having tummy issues, I find that it’s better to eat smaller amounts of simpler foods more frequently throughout the day. That is what I need to start doing again.

5. Bonus! Write at least two blog posts

I’m not going to require myself to complete this goal this week, especially since the other goals are more important. But I wanted to add this one as a little bonus thing for myself.

And there we go! I was thinking of adding the dog walking in again, but I feel like that’s quickly becoming a habit that I will keep up.

Wow, five goals this week. Until I sat down to think about my goals, I had no clue that was going to happen. But, onward and upward!

Getting back on track

I used to set goals for myself on a weekly basis, especially during and immediately after my big illness. I keep trying to get back to those habits and systems that helped me to feel healthy and be productive, but it’s tough.

For the past several weeks, I’ve been following Kelli Taylor’s blog (Kelli from Blimey Cow). Each Monday she posts a new set of goals for the week along with a follow-up report card from the previous week’s goals. Since I’ve been having such a hard time sticking to my systems and such, I’m gonna borrow this idea for myself. (Hope that’s okay, Kelli!) Just another system to help keep me on track.

1. No technology after 10:00 pm.

In an effort to get myself prepared for and into bed (to actually sleep) sooner, I’ve decided to bring back an old goal that I used to keep on a regular basis. So unless there’s some actual good reason, I’m not going to use any technology after 10:00 pm. The only exceptions being my CD player for some sleepy-time Odyssey or music, and Game of Thrones watching parties on the weekend. 🙂

2. Walk the dogs daily.

I used to take the muppies for walks on a regular basis. This past weekend, I was dog/house sitting and took this other dog for walks each day. During one of those walks, I thought to myself, “Why don’t I take my dogs for walks anymore? I love taking walks with them.” And so, this has become my second goal for this week. Not only will the dogs really enjoy the time outside, it will keep me moving. Which is something I need more of, especially with a lack of motivation and cold temperatures.

3. Keep a positive attitude.

As most of my friends know, I’m super positive. But I’m including this as a goal because as I get started with these other goals, I need to remember to stay positive. I might fail with some things, but I’ll get there eventually. Though I’m purposely keeping these goals fairly simple.

Anywho, there you have it. I’ll follow-up next Monday with a report on how I did.

Okay, it’s been long enough…

I keep thinking about this blog.

Especially recently.

I keep wishing that I could post regularly on it.

And then I realize that I can. I just have to follow some simple advice from our great friend Shia LaBeouf. 😉

For me, this past year has been about jumping in and just doing whatever. If I really want something, I have to start making decisions to work towards that thing. Don’t worry to much about getting it right the first time, just do it!

And so I start. Here is the first step towards my lofty blogging goals!