This is my first post in a long time. It’s been a busy year so far with lots of changes, including a big move! 🙀 So let’s do a little bit of a recap and update on what’s new with Matthew (that’s me).

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Where in the world is Matthew the Bird?

There’s some big news that some folks already know while others do not yet.

Back at the end of 2023 I moved away from Metro Vancouver to the lovely Okanagan Valley as a stepping point to whatever was next for me. There was no solid plan or direction that I had chosen at that point, I just needed to get away from Vancouver for various reasons.

While in the Okanagan Valley, I did a lot of unpacking and reflection on where I was with my life. I went through a couple of cycles of knowing what I was doing and setting up a plan for the future. But as time moved on I’d change my mind or things would go in a different direction… or even more often, depression would increase and make daily living difficult.

Eventually I went back to an idea that I had been kicking around for a few years; what if I moved back to my hometown in Northern Canada?

I was missing the river and land that I had grown up around, including the animals that also called that area home. And of course there were numerous people that I had been missing and hadn’t seen in years! So even though I didn’t really have the funds to make the trip home, I somehow was able to get things arranged for my big trip back north! Big thanks to some good friends who helped to make the journey possible!

Now I’m writing this from my own place in my hometown! 😸 It’s been a looong, winding, and difficult road to get myself re-established here, but with time, persistence, help from friends, and a lot of patience, things have worked out. I’m definitely glad that I made the decision to move home. It’s been good for me in so many ways!

Currently I’m…

Over the past year I’ve been spending most of my time healing from past traumas and working on my mental state. There are many aspects in this area for me to work on, so it’s been difficult to get started and get things sorted out.

I’m very grateful for the help of my counsellors and friends for being here for me. It’s a lot to support someone with a lot going on in their life that’s challenging them, and I recognize that. So having people around actively helping me with all of that (and more!) is actually amazing!

Besides that, I’ve been figuring out what direction to take my life in general, as well as what activities to actively cultivate. There are so many things to do and only so much time to utilize!

The primary areas of interest that I’ve been working on include music & art, nature, reconnecting, and organizing/simplifying.

There’s a ensemble music club in town now that I’ve joined! I’ve already gotten to perform with them a few times on the clarinet which has been a real thrill! The people are fantastic and chill to spend time with both during music practices and socially.

With art I’ve been picking up various activities like beading, knitting, and the like. But what I’ve really been into is papier-mâché! I’ve already made a bunch of shapes to play around with techniques and formulas for the glue mixture. So far things are going well. More importantly, I’m having fun and using the art time to relax, be in the present moment, and it’s just for myself.

There’s a lot more that I’ve been doing as well, but that’s some of the smaller stuff I’m excited about! 😺

What I’m planning

Moving forward, I will be posting here on my blog regularly as both a writing tool and to keep friends and family updated on my exploits. Exactly how frequently posts will be made is a matter that will be tested and figured out as time goes on. I don’t want to over-burden myself with lofty goals, especially ongoing exercises and tasks.

Besides that goal with this blog, I’ve been seriously considering my future and what I’d like to pursue. There are many things that I could do and many things that I have done that I could pick up again to continue. But this time, as I’m making decisions and plans, I’m more intentionally letting go of other ideas, projects, and plans.

In the past I’ve had a tendency to take on too many tasks/projects/jobs at the same time which would often lead to burn out or some tasks/jobs being completed at a sub-standard quality level. I’d also have those other ideas and stuff taking up brain space and thinking power as my thoughts would wander. It would also cause anxiety as I’d feel like there’s more to do and I wasn’t getting the current things done fast enough to move on to the next tasks, even though they weren’t necessarily going to be able to worked on right away.

So, by making more concrete decisions and not holding on to things that aren’t for the present moment, I believe that I’ll generally be able to reduce more of my ambient anxiety and stress.

M3